Let me paint a scenario for you, and then give me your opinion on it.

My girl and I were in the middle of a hot and heavy session. She was laying on her stomach as I was kissing the small of her back. In a very sexy way I asked her if she could lay on her back so that I can see her eyes when I’m on top of her. As she turns around she swings her left arm first, and her elbow lands right at the top of my head knocking me back. Not only did I see stars, but I think I saw some cartoon birds as well.

Shit, talk about a mood killer, how do you recover from something like that? well, we were horny, so after putting ice on my head and then icy hot, we picked up where we left off.

Now I only bring this up because the next day, the same damn thing happened, this time on my nose. Yeah I know, I have to either learn to duck, learn my lesson, or just stop fucking around massaging and kissing her back and then asking her to turn over. Mind you, the second time when she bloodied my nose, we were actually laughing about it, but that didn’t stop us.

Now my question is, what’s the statistic on bedroom accidents during love making? What about the guys that think they are acrobats and fall off the bed right on their asses? Has anybody ever gone to the emergency room with a burn on their asses from fucking on the stove? This is the kind of shit I think about during my down time when I’m not editing videos or pictures.

What about this, has there been a situation where a couple been having sex so vigorously that the the poor dog thought it was a fight and bit one of them in the ass???

I now really want to know about this, and I mean beyond the regular pushing the girl so hard during missionary position the the guy is clueless she’s banging her head on the headboard or wall. I’ve heard about the girl that gets her fingers pinched between the headboard and the wall when she’s holding on to the headboard. Of course there’s also the occasional charley horse when you least expect it. However can that really be consider an injury?

True story!
I knew somebody that was getting frisky with his girl in the wild, and some how a bee stung the tip of his cock. I wouldn’t have believed it if he didn’t drop his drawers at my friends house and was showing everybody. Now I personally think he was trying to fuck the beehive, cause how in the heck does a bee sting you right on the head of your cock? But to each his own I always say.

Now I had to bring all this up because more than once I have been the victim of a sex injury. Like the time I got tied up to my bed so tight I couldn’t move. Come to find out the girl was into hurting their partners, and I freaked the hell out when I saw the knife come out of her back pocket. She made a small knick on my belly with the tip of her knife, poured beer on it, and licked it all up. Oh yeah, that was my birthday sex. Thanks, but not thanks lady, you can keep your freaky sex.

So come on readers, I really want to know your “sex injuries” stories. I think that no matter how bad it might have been at the time, I’m sure you are now looking back and laughing at all this. So share with us and let’s compare stories, or as they say, “war scars”.

Infidelity is defined as: “sexual unfaithfulness to one’s husband, wife, or lover”. Sexual unfaithfulness – that could be a broad range of things, so let’s take it a step further.

Sexual is defined as:

1. Of, relating to, involving, or characteristic of sex, sexuality, the sexes, or the sex organs and their functions.

2. Implying or symbolizing erotic desires or activity.

3. Relating to, produced by, or involving reproduction characterized by the union of male and female gametes:

Well that really doesn’t make the whole thing any easier now does it? The whole debate all comes down to individual beliefs and what each individual would consider as infidelity. For some, infidelity might include everything sexual, physical, via the phone or even the Internet. So if this is the case, for these people, is watching porn even considered cheating.

For others, infidelity is anything sexual in a physical manner. This includes sexual penetration, all forms of oral sex, fondling, kissing etc with anyone other than your partner. There are others still who believe that you don’t have to become physical with someone for it to be infidelity. Emotional cheating is on the rise with the popularity of the Internet.

What is Emotional cheating? It layman’s terms, it’s when you come emotionally connected to someone other than your partner. You may really enjoy spending time with them, talking to them and sharing your thoughts and concerns with them. You enjoy being with them so much that you would rather spend your free time with them than your partner.

So now I go back to the question I posed at the beginning. If you are online, flirting and playing around sexually with someone, is this cheating? There is no physical contact, so that doesn’t play a role in the question. It all comes down to the emotional cheating aspect of infidelity.

Perhaps the two individuals don’t know each other beyond the Internet, and have no risk of ever meeting each other face to face, but feel a strong connection to one another. Perhaps the two individuals are friends and only play online for sexual release, and have no emotional connection to one another beyond that of regular friendship. Perhaps even still, the individuals are complete strangers from a random chat room, who both felt a little horny at the same time.

What could cause problems in a relationship is if one partner believes that online flirting and role-play IS cheating while the other believes it to be harmless fun, and being no more harmful than watching porn or reading erotica.

But the question remains, is it really harmful if you are flirting or playing online with someone if your partner doesn’t know about it? There are no performs or colognes to be smelled on you by your partner. No lies to make up about where you’ve been for the past few hours. No risks of STD’s or unwanted pregnancies. In the same breath, there has to be taken into consideration your partner’s feelings on the issue. Would they be hurt to learn you’ve been doing this? Would they care since there was no physical contact?

So as all things in the exciting, thrilling, wonderful and sometimes confusing as hell world of sex, what you thought was a cut and dry Yes or No answer, can easily turn into something with almost a life of its own. Just remember, that whatever you choose, in a relationship there is always someone else to consider beside yourself. .

Many people fantasize about being with another partner, it’s normal in any relationship to wonder “what if”.  Going that extra step and turning fantasy into reality takes a special kind of personality.

Having an affair means being able to look at your partner each day knowing that you have violated a trust.  Having an affair means you have to deal with a variety of emotions that could include guilt and fear.  Would you be able to cope with knowing that someone might find out your little secret?

Being faithful is hard work.  Just look at the statistics.  Many more people are being unfaithful and more marriages are ending in divorce than ever before.

But what drives someone to have an affair?

Is it the excitement of feeling someone different touch you?  Caress you?  Kiss you?

Being intimate with someone else outside of a relationship is an adrenaline rush.  There’s no denying that very moment when there’s penetration, hearing the gasp of your partner, the gentle squeezing and the release at climax can be addictive.  It is a spark that quite often has been missing from the long-term relationship.

Having an affair may have its merits but throwing caution to the wind may be best suited for fantasy.  Keep your relationship fresh with role play, surprises and an willingness to explore.  Be creative and use some toys, push your limits and then beyond

In my previous article, I touched on the rules and guidelines to make this type of relationship work for both parties involved. Now although, it’s best for these rules to be followed, it’s only human nature to begin having an emotional attachment on some level to the person in you’re in the Friends with Benefits relationship with. These attachments can vary from simply wanting to spend more time with the individual, to something a little more serious such as feelings of jealousy when they begin a new committed relationship (that’s not with you!)

These types of feelings can come with the territory, and are to be expected to a degree. It’s when they begin to become overwhelming when things can get a little hairy. So to prevent yourself from getting hurt when your Friends with Benefits relationship comes to an end, it’s important to prepare yourself mentally and emotionally prior to even beginning.

Preparing yourself emotionally stats long before you even step foot into the bedroom for the first time. It begins when the idea of the relationship is first presented. You must tell yourself that the whole purpose of this is JUST SEX. Nothing more. It’s all about fun between the sheets, enjoying the pleasures of the body and then moving on.

You have to keep telling yourself (sometimes over and over) that it’s all about the sex here and now. As I mentioned in my previous article, it takes a special type of personality to feel 100% comfortable and fall easily into this type of relationship. It takes someone who enjoys sex, and can put their mind in a place that the sex is simply “helping out a friend” while getting a little pleasure out of it or themselves as well.

A technique that can be used to help eliminate any emotional connections is every now and again to cool things off for a bit. A ’semi break up’ if you will of the Friends with Benefits relationship. If things have been going great for a few weeks or even a month, and you think you really have a good thing going here, and want to preserve it (keep in mind, this type of relationship often has a short shelf life) than take a step back from it for a week or two. Limit the time spent together as well as communication. If during this time you feel a longing for the other individual than you my friend have an emotional attachment building. For some during this cooling off period, they may begin to feel pissed off with the fact that their friend hasn’t called or tried to contact them. This can be a good thing for some people, as it can help end a connection that was building that you didn’t even know had begun. When the pissed off feeling turns into a “Fine, Fuck you too!” than you’re ready to start the sex again.

If you feel a deep emotional bond with the person you need to bring it to their attention as soon as possible. Perhaps they are feeling the same, and a new committed relationship can begin. Perhaps not. But it’s important to address the issue to prevent hurt feelings down the road.

Are you in a Friends with Benefits relationship now? Have you been in one in the past? I welcome your comments on how things went for you. Was it a good experience? Bad? Would you do it again? Common people.. I’m all ears!!

She’s married, he’s single, but truly playing the field. He comes to her when he’s got “girl” troubles, and she just talks about all the crap that goes on at the office.

They’ve known each other for a little over 3 years, and it hasn’t gone beyond them just being friends, and meeting at least 3 times per week for lunch. They don’t talk on the phone, and they don’t call each other outside office hours. Emails are constrained to just jokes and making appointments for lunch meetings. HONESTLY, they are just friends!!!!

So this is what is going on in the guy’s head:

“Damn she’s got great big tits. I wonder how her lips will feel wrapped around my cock. If she weren’t my friend I’d definitely do her. Oh wait, she’s married. Whatever, what her husband won’t know, it won’t hurt him. OH MY GOD!!! stop thinking like that dude, she’s YOUR FRIEND. You can’t fuck your friend. Besides, she doesn’t like you that way, or she would have put on the move on you long ass time ago. She does keep saying that I’m one of her best friends. Why so much emphasis on that? Is there a hidden message that she wants me to break?

Ok, stop trying to look at the tattoo near her breast, and don’t ask her to unbutton any more buttons. I wonder if she’d showed it to me?. Wait, what am I thinking, I’ve already seen it.

Much to everybody’s surprise, this is what she’s thinking;

He’s got the greatest set of lips, they are so kissable and yummy. GOD why hasn’t he put the moves on me yet? I will so leave my husband for him. Look at how great we both get along; we can chat for hours and hours, and he’s a great listener. He looks at me so intently. I wish my husband would look at me like that. I bet he’s really romantic too, he can take me for a walk on the beach and hold my hand. Then at the end of the walk he can grab my face with both hands and just kiss me long and tenderly while the sun goes down over the horizon. Umm that’s very passionate.

I can very well imagine a very romantic candle lit dinner for two just the two of us at the beach, and the sound of the waves.

Now we all know this relationship is not going to happen. Specially if none of them makes the first move. So they will go on to be great friends forever and ever, and one day when her marriage is over, they’ll get together and fuck like bunnies.

For an open relationship to be successful, a number of factors must come into play. First and foremost, like I’ve already stated, there must be a very strong level of trust and honesty among primary partners. You have to be so comfortable with both your partner as well as yourself that you will not become jealous in knowing your partner is having sex with someone other than yourself. You must also trust your partner will partake in safe sex practices with their other partners, to ensure that they don’t bring home a sexually transmitted disease to you.

Both primary partners must be able to talk open and honestly with each other, about everything and anything that is on their mind. Don’t lie. Have open, honest conversations with your partner about anything that makes you uneasy. Your partner must know what you’re thinking and feeling about any given situation. Secrets can destroy your open relationship – just as any relationship.

It is also important to remember to keep your primary partner number one in your heart. Strong emotional connections can often accompany sex, and it’s vital to be aware of this. If you begin to develop a strong emotional bond with one of your other partners, you must end the relationship with that partner immediately, or risk permanent damage to your own primary relationship.

Some people will want to know whom their primary partner is sleeping with, while others would rather simply not know. This is totally up to the individual, but should be decided upon during the initial discussions prior to beginning your open relationship.

Another thing to keep in mind is to keep the specific sexual details out of the discussion. Your primary partner will not want to know the dirty little details (unless they’re into that sorta thing) of your sexual adventures beyond him or her. Granted, if you do learn something new share or show it to your primary partner as it can spice up your own love life between you two.

Before entering into an open relationship, it should be dicuessed and thought about very seriously. Yes, it sounds wonderful to start out with. You’re basically been given a free pass to sleep around when you feel like it, but you have to remember that your partner will be doing the same. Can you seriously handle that? If you say yes really quickly, than you haven’t considered everything long enough.

If two people enter into this type of relationship without fully understanding what it entales, than it could potentually rip apart and distory the relationship totally. It all goes back to trust, trust trust. Trusting your primary partner with your heart and body, and knowing in the end you are the one in their heart and you alone.

If you are seriously considering entering into an open relationship, I suggest doing it as an experimental thing. A trial peroid of a month for example. To feel out yourself and your partner, see how the whole thing makes both of you feel. See if any feelings of jealousy rise to the surface, if this type of thing is really for you. Testing the waters, and being experimental allows you to learn first hand if it will work for you, and if not, than you still have a chance of not doing damage to the relationship as a whole.

Good Luck.

For a lot of women (and some men too), sex over time with a friend can often bring forward feelings of attachment, which of course is totally natural. So before beginning a ‘friends with benefits’ relationship, it is recommended that a series of “ground rules” be put into place beforehand; if nothing else than to prevent confusion down the road, which could hamper or even destroy the friendship as a whole.

Can the ‘Friends with Benefits’ relationship really work? Yes, it can with the right people and circumstances. Now there are a variety of “rules” you can find for such a relationship, but I’m going out outline my own set of ‘guidelines’

# 1: Both friends must be clear in what you want. To make your ‘friends with benefits’ relationship a good one, both must know what to expect from one another. Keep in mind there is no ‘one size fits all’ solution to this. What you need and expect might be different from each ‘friends with benefits’ relationship you have. It all depends on what each of you need at the time.

#2: Select your ‘friends with benefits’ friend carefully. This can be the most difficult part of the whole relationship, as the entire thing requires a specific balance. You need to be able to enjoy spending time with one another (both in a regular friends setting, as well as between the sheets), and that both of you are looking for the same thing in the relationship.

# 3: Create a set of Ground Rules. Every ‘friends with benefits’ relationship needs a clear set of boundaries. Sit down with one another and decide what will work best for the both of you.

# 4: Stick to the rules. Keep in mind it can be easy to get sidetracked. Perhaps you’re spending more time together than you should, or beginning to care more about the friend than you should at this level. Keep in mind the rules should always be followed, and only be broken if both decide to change the nature of the relationship.

# 5: End the relationship if things begin to get weird or too heavy. This type of relationship often has a very short life span and can often turn into something deeper for one or both friends. If things are beginning to feel weird between the two friends, or if deeper emotions are beginning to form, it’s time to end the ‘friends with benefits’ relationship, unless both friends are OK with these changes.